Note: The reason for one being "bedridden" varies. This post focuses on the type of "bedridden" voluntarily done by the individual and not officially prescribed by the doctor. If you feel ill to the end that you feel you need to stay in bed for a majority of the day, for a prolonged period of time, please tell your doctor, who will assess the situation medically.
Ever since I learned to walk with a walker at age 5, it was fair to say that I was a very active child, considering. By the time I was 10, my walking speed noticeably surpassed that which was expected for someone with my form of Cerebral Palsy. I practically ran everywhere I went, and I'd very rarely use my wheelchair. For as much as my walker limited me, it freed me. It allowed me enough autonomy so that I could go from point A to point B whenever I wanted. It held me upright on my feet, and people had to practically run to keep up with me. I never liked being still, caged in or told when I could explore and how, and my walker made sure those things scarcely happened.
And then... It all slipped away... Nearly overnight. I was nearly 13 when my seizures and drop foot first occurred, and they came on seemingly at the same time. It was a medical roundhouse kick from out of the blue. Long story short, my illness grew and grew and grew, and I got weaker and tired and depressed. I went almost completely wheelchair bound by the time I was14. I was around 15 when I started having extreme nausea every morning, accompanied by terrible, acute pain in my lower abdomen, near my pelvic area. The pain would just stab me randomly, sometimes folding me in half at the waist, punching sobs from my eyes with no resistance. I'd always been tough, resilient, but not now; the pain increased in frequency and severity and literally drained me of my strength. Every time an episode would happen, I'd feel a pop in my abdomen and a sudden heat would pool near my pelvic region, which felt like someone was pouring hot blood into a crevasse. It was tender to the touch.
Some people thought I was faking, making an act. I wasn't. One day, it happened while I was lying in bed and it startled me and hurt so badly I struggled to breathe. I grabbed my headboard and yelled out, feeling my abdomen gurgle and heat up again. My father rushed in and called my mother, who dialed for an ambulance. The OB/GYN came in and upon examination, concluded that an ovarian cyst had enlarged and ruptured, and told me that there was a chance I would need surgery if things didn't return to their normal size. Though I haven't had anymore ruptured cysts, I've fought the "morning sickness" everyday since.
Just like with usual "morning sickness", my taste and smell is impacted day-by-day. One minute, I'll like milk (just opened), the next it'll seem spoiled. One day, I will crave asparagus, and the next, I will barely ingest anything but a protein drink and some water. Some days, I'll wake up feeling fine and then 10 minutes later, I'll be leaning over the edge of my bed, sweating and moaning and retching. While there are the days when I'm seemingly free of nausea, there are also the days (as was the majority case in my high school years and now), that I will literally stay in bed all day, save getting up briefly for necessity. I sometimes feel too weak to do anything but lay there, and so my mom will bring my food to me and rub ointment on my back to keep me from getting bed sores.
I've never been pregnant, and so understandably, when people hear that, they resort to the belief that the illness is all in my head. That upsets me, because I know it's not. Starting after the cysts, my hormones began to fluctuate tremendously, likely causing the nausea and triggering the PNE seizures. Thankfully, the nausea is gone by early to mid-afternoon, which is when I start my days now most of the time. My seizures and nausea put me on medical homebound for the last stretch of my senior year in high school, and when I did return to school for the remaining 2 months, my counselor was able to set me up for half-day arrivals, with homebound assistance after school. Without that, I wouldn't have graduated. Needless to say, there's no doubt that the last 4 years have tried and tested my fortitude to the maximum, and sometimes it's hard looking back at where I was before middle school.
I was such a joyful child, energetic and well, and before I knew it I could no longer walk more than 5 minutes at a time before collapsing. I could no longer go places without a caregiver shadowing. I no longer had mornings to enjoy and utilize. Though I'm bouncing back quickly, I often think about my days now for what they really are: gifts. Because I sleep (or moan) through most mornings now, hit hard by invisible illness, when I do have the energy and yearning to get up, it's a battle. Getting dressed, though my mother does it, takes much movement and concentration and that's hard when you feel dizzy, nauseated and shaky. Sometimes in those periods of times that I'm "bedridden", I will get down on myself and think, "What's wrong with you!?" or "Look at how much of you're life you've wasted by lying in bed... You can't even see the sunshine in your window (I have special curtains to keep out natural light to ease the illness)." Sometimes I'll cry because I feel like I'm just letting valuable moments go by that I'll never, ever get the chance to experience. After spending one or two entire days in bed, you start to feel as though the world goes on not seeing you, like you're lying in the middle of some street and everyone goes around you. Life goes on and you can't be a part of it. You miss chances to say "I love you", to go to the park, see a movie, to meet a potential significant other, to get some coffee at the bookstore, or sit on the porch and chat with family.
I'm thankful however, for God and my medications, which strengthen me and keep the illnesses at bay. Because I know it is the Will of The Lord for me to be prosperous and in health (1 John 3:2), I can claim that and know that as I push myself to live and experience life, regardless of how I feel, He will be there to hold me up and help me stay up through to the end of each day. It is due to this, that I've been able to slowly resume public socialization and advocacy events. Even though most days, my body feels ill and tired, my core is made stronger by the love of God and those He puts in my life to remind me that my presence and contribution are still and always needed... in one way or another, whether it's through praying for someone, getting up and still going outdoors, or blogging.
MY TIPS FOR GETTING THROUGH BEING "BEDRIDDEN" & WHY:
1.) Distinguish Between Physical Illness & Anxiety: While these two things often correlate with each other, figuring out what is truly causing you to stay in bed for prolonged periods of time is vital to begin treatment. Consult your doctor of course.
2.) If It Won't Harm You, Get Up: While my nausea is truly medically validated, and can be debilitating, I can still function with medication. Though the nausea often renders me very dependent on others, it won't physically harm me to get up despite the sick feeling. The longer you stay in bed, the more lethargic you will become, and when you're lethargic, your nutritional intake will drop, which may require you to be admitted to a hospital. As much as possible, try to get up and stay up, even if it's just to sit in a different room. Don't let your body get accustomed to being ill. Staying on your back will slow blood circulation, increase your chances of heart disease and bed sores. You need some exercise to get your blood flowing and hydration to help ease illness.
3.) Do Whatever You Can, When You Can: Instead of feeling bad that you've seemingly "wasted" a whole day, make a point to - in the brief periods of time that you feel the most well - leave contributions of your light and love in some way. Send emails, call someone, get up and open up the curtains, or leave Thank You notes for those who've helped you
4.) Play Upbeat Music: This is huge! No matter how you feel, always, always play music by your bed while you're in it for long periods of time due to illness. Make sure it's flowing and sweet and empowering... Something that'll make you want to dance or help lift your spirits. You can also play Bible teachings.
5.) Use Natural Light: If you can't get it via window, get a natural light lamp. Natural light (sunlight) will aid in your emotional wellbeing, which in turn will help keep you energized and wanting to get up when you're well enough.
6.) Get Ample Nutrition, Hydration & Exercise: Talk to your doctor about magnesium, iron, vitamins C and D and any other vitamins and minerals that may help you. Stay hydrated. Don't let your muscles atrophy due to lack of nutrition and exercise, and it's not enough to have someone else move your limbs; they'd be the ones getting the exercise benefit, not you. The most that'd do is help keep you from being sore. But you need to be the one to move and exercise in whatever way(s) your doctor suggests. Don't do anything without consulting them first.
7.) Stay Fresh: Change your bedding often, as well as your clothing. Even it you're going to be in bed all day, consider getting dressed for the day and not wearing pajamas for your emotional wellbeing. By doing this, you'll be ready to go outside and get things done as soon as you're well enough. Take a bath or shower as often as you would if you weren't sick, if possible, and if you're doctor says it's okay, refrain from getting too warm. Make sure your body stays comfortably cool and you don't sweat too much, so that your risk of bed sores is decreased and you feel better overall. Also, make sure clean, fresh air is circulating throughout your house, but most especially in your bedroom.